Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
wow bdsm is so cute
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Randomize
