There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Randomize
