Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
Randomize