We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
Randomize
