Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
Randomize
