On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
She's the barista slut.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
Randomize