I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
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