I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Randomize
