We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
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As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
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Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...