I tried to use my car keys to open my door
I just started a sentence with yellow.
Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
What drink are we having for lunch?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
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