Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Your dad touched me again.
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
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