She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
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