God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
I smell like Dick and happiness
Randomize
