Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
