I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
It's okay, I found my phone in the toaster oven. Logical explanation: 5 martinis
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
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