Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
Operation Purity has been aborted
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
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