Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
Randomize
