So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
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