I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
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