Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
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