Dude, just got a bummer.
A blow job from a homeless chick.
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
Confessions From 23 People Who Have Been Hiding Terrible Secrets
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?