Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
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