Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
Randomize
