Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
Randomize