windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
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