Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
3pm strippers are depressing
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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