its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
Randomize