He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
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