mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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