I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
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I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
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I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
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