yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Randomize
