The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser