Pappa wants mamma naked
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
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