We should be called the Road Head Warriors
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
Randomize
