so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
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