I have demons in me.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
