the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
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