All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Randomize