fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
Randomize