am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
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She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
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What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
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