So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
My mom just told me that the key to a successful marriage is never seeing your partner take a shit.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
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