p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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