I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
Randomize