She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
Randomize
