no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
