Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
This show inspires me to have sex in space
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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