____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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