If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
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