wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize