the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
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