How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Randomize
